Fourteen (Words, Worlds and Girlhood Teenage)

What exactly have you been so afraid of? Take the steps you want, run around in the bushes, touch all the leaves you want to – you won’t be dirtying anything. You are a devotee of words; you are a dreamer of worlds. You shall only know peace when you have your dragon and the dragon wishes to keep learning different ways of expression, the shifts, the slides, and the falls and rises. Hear the air around you. Aren’t your breaths sounding more courageous than before?

Thirteen (God)

God doesn’t have any face. Or body. Or hands or legs. I don’t know why I think I see him but I do. I know I do.

Twelve (Under The Moonlight)

Before my eyes stopped moving, I saw a crown of flowers and bones on my soul. I presume, the flowers were for my flesh and the bones for my skeleton. After all, what we shed also becomes an inevitable part of our identity.

Eleven (The Magician)

I tell you tales of being unable to care and you tell me tales of being unable to look away. But we look at each other and care for each other. That is acceptable and allowed.

Ten (Goddess – 12.07.2022)

If Mom were a goddess, her sculpture would be of a woman on her scooter, with a to-do list, a pen, a rolling pin, a marksheet, a cheque, a paintbrush, a pair of pliers, a novel, and her heart in eight of her hands. Her hair would be made in a bun and a helmet would be thrown on the ground to signify the irritation cause by it.

Nine (Friends)

By the time I realised I needed boundaries, I’d given away the fences in donation (lol).

Eight (Thirsty)

Spiders don’t bother me. Lizards do. Lizards feel like robbers intruding on my privacy and I get very self-conscious. So, I never open my windows till it gets too suffocating to breathe. However, when I do open it, I keep a watch on the window the entire time, hitting the wall at regular intervals to make sure that approaching lizards run away.

Seven (My Mother In Me)

I sit cross-legged on the bed, notes on Code of Civil Procedure on my right thigh, the bare act to my left and inhale the sound of retro music playing on the radio. Mom loves Vividh Bharati.The AC cold swirls around in the air and pulls me by the tip of my nose to write […]

Six (Strength That Breaks)

ToMy childhood bestie, Today, on your birthday, I wanted to write you the most beautiful letter about our happiest memories. But then, I got reminded of how happiness hurts you these days. It’s gotten so far away, hasn’t it? My friend, you’re strong even when you cry. You cry these days, look at me with […]

Five (Crying, Music, and Nostalgia at Midnight)

I visited my music teacher, “Miss” as we call her, yesterday, accidentally crashed a 6 YO’s class, and sang with her classical songs as she played her very same worn harmonium that she played for me 10 years ago, 5 years ago, and even before Corona. I realised how far I had come from my roots, from Classical music, from Bangla. It felt like I was an outsider only in the home for visiting.